


Not As Alone As He Thought

by afteriwake



Series: A Thousand Suns [3]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-16
Updated: 2012-10-16
Packaged: 2017-11-16 10:43:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/538596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At least now he knew he wasn't alone in his disappointment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not As Alone As He Thought

  
_'Cause once you got a theory of how the thing works_   
_Everybody wants the next thing to be just like the first_   
Linkin Park, “When They Come For Me”   


He was used to it, now, to be compared to Kurosaki. Oh, he didn't like it, not at all, but for those who knew about Hollows, knew that Kurosaki had been fighting them and now he was, he was used to the comparisons.

Of course, right now, he wasn't doing much fighting. He wasn't doing any. He was in a hospital bed, left surrounded by sterile white walls and the smell that all hospitals had. He hated hospitals, hated this hospital, and not just because his father ran it. He hated it because it had taken his father from him. He would have liked, just once, for his father to acknowledge that he was proud of him. But he was never home, and he disapproved of all things Quincy, and thus their separation became bigger and bigger until the gulf between them stretched too far to bridge.

So that was why he was surprised to have a visitor. He had expected Inoue-kun, and she did come to visit, but he hadn't expected Arisawa-san. But she was there, for an hour or so every day, keeping him informed of what was going on at school and giving him his work and writing the answers for him. He appreciated it. Inoue-kun, as much as he cared for her, would not have thought to do these things.

And finally, after a week, he stopped wondering and simply decided to find out. “Why do you come here?” he asked.

She shrugged, not looking up. “If this had happened to me you'd be there. You wouldn't want the class rankings to go down because I wasn't there.”

“Oh,” he said quietly.

“And...well, you helped save my friend. I owe you for that. If bringing you work and turning it in for you makes up some part of the debt I owe you, then I'll do it.” She looked at him, and then smiled slightly. “I don't like owing people.” 

“You owe me no debt,” he said, surprised.

“I was supposed to protect her,” she said, setting down the work she had been doing for him. “I don't know if you remember, but she used to have short hair. Some girls cut it off to make her look ugly. When I saw that, I decided I would protect her. I didn't want to see her cry again.”

“I remember,” he said. “I don't like to see her cry, either.”

“It's almost like when she cries you can't help but get depressed. You can't comfort her because if she's crying then things are bad. She always has a smile on her face.” She frowned. “Always had. Sometimes, when she doesn't realize I'm watching, she gets very serious, almost sad.”

“Do you know what happened to her?” he asked.

“Mostly, yeah,” she said with a nod. “I know about the abuse, and I know about how you and Ichigo saved her. I know he turned into a...thing...and I know how you lost a hand trying to protect her. She's told me those things, when I stay over and she has a nightmare. She doesn't sleep much now.”

“I didn't know that.” He looked at her. “What about you?”

“What about me?” she asked, raising an eyebrow slightly.

“I know Aizen almost killed you,” he said.

“Oh, that.” She looked away slightly. To anyone who walked into the room she would appear to be looking at him, but she was looking just above him. “I was terrified.”

“Do you dream about it?”

“Sometimes, yeah,” she said with a slight nod, looking at him again. “Sometimes I feel myself start to break apart. He was destroying things simply by being there. I dream that he got closer and I started to dissolve. I always wake up before I fade away completely.”

“You seem to be taking it well,” he replied.

“Ichigo saved me, saved us,” she said. “That gets me through the night.”

“Of course,” Ishida said, shutting his eyes and facing the ceiling.

“I know you don't like him, but...why?” She waited for him to open his eyes again, to turn his head and face her. “What did he do that makes you hate him even now?”

He was quiet for a moment. “He saved the girl.”

“But you helped. That means something to her.”

He blinked. “What?”

“She may be completely infatuated with Ichigo, but you're special to her, too. She wouldn't come visit you if you weren't. Just because she isn't hopelessly in love with you doesn't make you unimportant in her life.”

He sighed. “And now you have confirmed exactly what I hate about the situation.”

Tatsuki's eyes widened. “You _like_ her, don't you?”

“Yes,” he said with a nod.

She smiled, and then a small laugh escaped from her lips. She threw her hands over her mouth, and stared at him for a moment before dropping them. “I'm not laughing at you, I promise. It's just...it shows me you're human.”

“What do you mean?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Sometimes I think you're a robot. You're so cool and aloof. The only time I ever see you display any emotion is when someone compares you to Ichigo. To knbow that you've got a crush on her...that's really kind of sweet.”

“I don't stand a chance though.”

“No, you don't.” She moved the chair closer, just a little, and put her hand on his good arm. “If it makes you feel any better, I don't stand a chance, either.”

“You like Inoue-kun?” he asked, his eyes going wide.

“What? No!” she said, outraged. She snatched her hand away. “I like Ichigo. But he's oblivious to me, just as much as he's oblivious to her. But if it came down to me or her, if he ever noticed either of us in that way, or both of us, he'd choose her. I know it in my heart. He taveled to Hueco Mundo to rescue her. I don't think he'd do that for me.”

“He would,” he replied. “Just like I am important to Inoue-kun, you're important to Kurosaki.”

“Just not as important,” she said wryly.

“Probably not,” he said. 

“See? So we're in the same boat,” she replied. “It's kind of nice to share that with someone.”

He pauesed, and then nodded slowly. “Yes, it is.”

“But we'll keep this between us, right? Because I'd hate to beat the crap out of you.”

He smiled slightly. “This stays between us.”

“Good. Then she looked away and focused on the homework. “We should get back to this.”

“When you visit tomorrow, can you stay longer?” he asked.

“I can try,” she said, looking up again. “Why?”

“I really do like your company,” he said. “Even if you're only doing this because you believe you are in my debt.” He watched her blush slightly. “But if you cannot, I understand.”

She thought for a moment. “I don't have to be at the dojo until three, but...I can cancel my class tomorrow.”

“You don't need to do that,” he replied.

“No, it's fine,” she said. “I mean, I like your company, too. So...I can come by and stay for a while.”

“That's good,” he said, the ghost of a warm smile crossing his face. When she smiled back he felt his smile become more real, warmer, more assured. Perhaps it would be best if they became closer. At least then he wouldn't feel alone in his disappointment, and who knew? Maybe it would be good for him to have a friend who he had not gone through hell for. It would be nice to have a less complicated friendship with someone he could relate to.

After a moment another blush crept on her cheeks. “So, back to work?”

“Of course,” he said with a nod. She looked down at the papers and they settled back into their routine, which now felt more comfortable than it had before. And for that, he was glad.


End file.
